“Surely, I was sinful at birth, sinful from the time my mother conceived me. 6 Yet you desired faithfulness even in the womb; you taught me wisdom in that secret place. 7 Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow. 8 Let me hear joy and gladness; let the bones you have crushed rejoice. 9 Hide your face from my sins and blot out all my iniquity.
10 Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me.11 Do not cast me from your presence or take your Holy Spirit from me. 12 Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.” –Psalm 51:5-12
How’s your prayer life? We all have one. Sometimes it is deep and wide. Sometimes it feels like a mile long and an inch high and then there are those who pray so little they have difficulty conjuring up words to God because they have so little practice. So… allow me to ask again. How’s your prayer life? It’s not a trick question.
I know someone who interviewed 100’s of pastors and priests and ministers about their spiritual practices… specifically… their prayer life. He was looking at categories of time spent in prayer and the quality of their prayer life. He was surprised by the results. It seems the clergypersons who were most satisfied with their prayer life were the ones who spent the least time praying and the ones who were most disappointed and dissatisfied with their prayer life were the ones who prayed the most. Interesting, huh? And all this about the ones who our culture is quick to point out… after all THEY have a direct pipeline to the ‘big guy’ upstairs or walk at the right side of Jesus … who is at the right hand of the Father…
It seems the Psalmist realized a need for help.
Or think of it like this… asking personal questions like… ‘how am I doing?’… and looking deeper with a… ‘can I be better?’ or ‘do I need a change in my behavior?’… And if so… ‘what might that change look like?’ You see the Psalmist recognized the imperfection humanity has. We are sinful from birth… even before… even in our mother’s womb and all of us therefore have a need to be returned from our brokenness to righteousness. The Church calls this ‘original sin’… meaning we are sinners not because we sin occasionally … but rather we sin occasionally because we are sinners. NOTE: the word ‘sinner’ in the Bible does not mean… BAD… the word ‘sinner’ comes from the image of the archer… with a bow and arrow and the arrow (our actions) missing the mark… falling short of the target… thus not being a bad person… but rather each person being a bad shot.
In recovery ministry… those connected to AA and Al-Anon… there is a common understanding using the logical phrase… “if what I am doing is causing a problem or problems… then that thing I am doing is problem.” That sort of hits the nail on the head and if Einstein was right… the definition of ‘insanity’ is doing the same thing over and over again expecting a different result. Been there? Done that? The solution? Listen to the Psalmist…
Trust God and the work God is best at. We all have free will. We do what we want. And in each decision, there is a consequence. Yet God remains faithful. It is God who creates in us a clean heart. It is God who renews a steadfast spirit within us… one by one… reorganizing our thoughts which lead to an often-different set of actions. God will not cast any of us away as there is nothing we can do to make God love us more and there is nothing we can do that will make God love us less… and it is God who restores the joy we have and hold and the joy we share … granting us all a willing spirit to sustain us. So…stay close to God. Read the Word. Find ways to serve. Maybe it starts with prayer. God listens. God acts. Faith matters.
